Confessions of an Imperfect Wife

I have a confession to make. Ready? I fail miserably at being a wife. Let me explain.
A couple of Sunday's ago, I was really looking forward to going to church-with my husband. You see, our pastor Tim Grosshans was going to speak on marriage-you know, that 1 Corinthians 7 chapter. Well, I was really excited about this because I felt like my husband could use a "reminder" about what it meant to be, you know, a good husband. So I was all excited about the "reminders" my husband would be receiving and in turn, was really looking forward to this service.

Well of course, our 10-month old decided to fall asleep in the car (he was truly lacking sleep at that point) and thus, my husband decided to drive around in order to let him sleep. So there I was, going to this marriage service by myself even though I knew it was my husband that needed to be there.

Needless to say, the Lord spoke to me in some big ways. I remember walking out of the service thinking, "Jen, are you serious? Did you really think that you had this marriage thing all figured out? All morning you spent thinking about how good it would be for Luke to be reminded of some things when the reality is Jen, you needed to be reminded of many things!" Some of these things included:

* Snapping at my husband when "moody"

* Becoming easily annoyed over stupid things

* Expecting him to read my mind at all times

* Focusing on the things that would annoy me instead of focusing on the great things about my husband

* Being selfish

* Expecting him to be Jesus-basically, expecting him to be perfect
It was at that point that I realized how desperately I needed God to work in my own life. Instead of always thinking about the things that I felt needed to be changed in my husband, it was time for me to start thinking about the things that Christ wanted to change in my life in order to make me the wife that He not only desires for me to be, but also the wife that my husband deserves to have.

So, let me ask you this-are you always thinking about those areas in the life of your husband that you feel need to be changed, or are you spending more time at the feet of Jesus asking Him to change you and mold you into the wife that He desires you to be?

What areas of your life do you need to change?


2 comments:

Kerry Postel said...

Jen,
I have been doing the same thing. Instead of trying to change my husband I am thinking about what I do and say and what kind of wife I am. God is really helping me to see the areas in my life that I need to change and about bring Jesus focused through the day - not kerry focused. Not easy bur I find myself praying more throughout the day and asking Him for guidance. It's not about me, it's about God. Someone once said imagine Jesus is stood next to you all the time - would act / react differently to situations. Makes you really think about what you say and how you act
Kerry

RosebudWitt said...

Jen, you know what I love about you? You are so honest. It's so refreshing. I can totally relate to what you wrote. Thank you so much for sharing this.